October 30th, 2006

Vote Early and Often

 by Burt Prelutsky  
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If you crave perfection, I’m afraid you have to wait for Heaven.  Here on earth, the best you can hope for are Republican majorities in the House and the Senate.

There’s an election fast-approaching, and, this being what’s referred to as an off-year, we all pretty much know what to expect.  It means that instead of a 45% turn-out, we can expect a 30-something percent turn-out.  Actually, to my way of thinking, an off-year election is any election in which the Dummycrats have even the slightest chance of winning.

For months now, we’ve been told over and over again that, come November 7th, the conservatives are going to stay home in droves.  After all, they’re disenchanted with Bush in particular and with the GOP in general.  We’re told they want to whip the Republicans into line for ’08 by letting the liberals beat the pants off them in 2006.  After a while, it was hard to ignore this groundswell of moral indignation.  Then, one fine day, I had an epiphany.  How was it I didn’t know any of these right-wingers who were so ready and eager to hand the country over to the likes of Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid and the biggest lefty in the U.S. Senate, Barack Obama?

How was it that I only knew that millions of my fellow right-wingers were going to wave the white flag because I kept reading about it in the L.A. Times and hearing about it from Allan Colmes and Howard Dean?  Hardly what one would call objective, disinterested parties. 

The truth is, I know an awful lot of conservatives and I don’t know a single one who is so irresponsible, so unconcerned about America’s well-being, that he would sit idly by and allow this catastrophe to take place.

It would be bad enough to allow Democrats for the next two years to determine where and when, or even if, the war on terror will be waged; bad enough to allow them to eliminate Bush’s tax cuts; bad enough to let them decide whether or not to erect a wall along our southern border; bad enough to give them an even bigger say in who gets appointed to federal judgeships.  But the worst part is that there’s not only no guarantee that they’d be gone after a single term, but in fact not the slightest chance.  There is a reason, after all, that they’re called incumbents, not outcumbents.

Like many of you, I wish that every Republican politician was a Reagan-type conservative, but if they were, most of them wouldn’t have been elected in the first place.  Politics, as somebody probably once said, is the art of the possible.  If you crave perfection, I’m afraid you have to wait for Heaven.  Here on earth, the best you can hope for are Republican majorities in the House and the Senate.

Only you have the power to prevent left-wing propaganda straight out of the James Carville playbook from becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy.

So get out and vote, and, for once and for all, send the liberal pollsters packing.

Elections & Political Parties



Burt Prelutsky has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn, and Diagnosis Murder. He wrote a humor column for the Los Angeles Times and was the movie critic for Los Angeles magazine. His most recent book is Conservatives Are From Mars, Liberals Are From San Francisco (A Hollywood Rightwinger Comes Out of the Closet).
BurtPrelutsky@aol.com
http://www.burtprelutsky.com/

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