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More news from Bob Stapler.

Not exactly leftist, but Absurd-Iranistan says they’ll bury us when (not if) we attack.  First, barring a miracle of "Koranic proportions," there is little chance we’ll attack unless and until Iran proclaims it not only has a nuclear arsenal but also intends immediately exploding same in Israel, Iraq or a large U.S. city.  Are they telling us, by this, that they are a threat?  Bush is still smarting from an inability to convince the local loonies Iraq was ever more than an annoyance.  Secondly, and more relevant is, should we choose to invade Iran, what Iranian genius thinks he’s got a better chance stopping us than Iraq ever had?  Oh, excuse me, these particular Islamo-fascists are a theocracy and, therefore, have Allah solidly in their corner. Those other Islamo-fascists only imagined they had Allah’s backing and their leader was a secularist who only gave lip service to religion. I have no doubt G*d can (and does) intervene in our bloodlettings; but also believe it highly unlikely in the present context, is often other than as we expect or wish, and would have to be for reasons way beyond our reckoning. All other things being unequal (as between their and our military), I’d say these guys are just a tad overconfident. Still, and assuming we ever do invade, those graves won’t be a complete waste. They’ll just have slightly different occupants.

One county east of our Nation’s capital, and about 30-years behind the times, Prince Georges County is home to some of the poorest, mostly blue-collar culture this side of the country.  That doesn’t deter local government from soaking them to the bone .  The excuse, this time, is these folks just don’t seem to realize the havoc they are causing to property values. Well no duh!  Poor folks move in and property values go down.  Poor people are often renters who could care less about property values; and, even those who own have a slightly different notion of what constitutes classy (that ain’t no rusty junk, it’s my vintage Trans-Am lawn ornyment!).  They measure wealth and status by junk they own.  That’s because they lack the stock-options, mansions and Lear jets (with which to impress others) of their upscale elitist critics.  Now, the PG unsightliness nazis want them to cover up or get rid of their few sources of pride. Of course, one reason P.G. County attracted so many poor people in the first place has something to do with affirmative-action, a sanctuary state mentality, and the multi-generational dominance of the Democrat Party throughout Maryland (i.e., those perennial champions of the poor).

Apparently the liberal media is beside itself with glee regarding Warren Buffet eclipsing Rush Limbaugh’s record for highest all-time EBay bid.  Lost in the celebration is the Buffet donation goes to a charity whose primary aim is saving cows and chickens and only incidentally gives to San Francisco’s homeless (SF is a magnet for the homeless).  Upsetting the Left, we don’t seem to be reacting appropriately to the Buffet end-zone dance (we’re supposed to be in agony over the upstaging). Silly old Rush wasted his on an organization helping kids of dead heroes get first-rate educations. I couldn’t help but reflect on this, yesterday, while waiting at an intersection where perky-obnoxious-teen-charity-worker knocked on my tightly rolled up window imploring me to donate to PETA.  Sorry, mine goes to dead heroes – not pampered chickens.

If ever we needed proof that the inmates are in charge of the asylum, here it is (  ) – Abu Graib inmates (for those needing a translation: terrorists) are now suing contractor guards in our courts – exactly as predicted.  Is this any way to run a war?  Imagine FDR having to give every Nazi his day in court.  Surely some of those German kids must have been forced to fight and only killed our boys in self-defense.  With a little more sensitivity, we could have had them processed and out of those awful POW camps and back home in time for the Christmas counteroffensive.

Radio news broadcaster (Baltimore CBS/WCBM, 7/1/08) reports (in somber tones) that summer skin exposure is linked to cancer (gee, who would have ever known?!), and (surprise) sales of sun-block are up! The announcer then concludes the FDA is "still" not regulating SPF (as though obvious it should).  I know these guys have slow news days to fill, but you’d think they could, at minimum, refrain from inserting opinions they are a) unqualified to make and b) haven’t bothered to research.   This is mindless regurgitating of the socialist-party line (i.e., no matter what, regulate it).  The regulation he advocates generally deters product improvement.  Similarly, the obsession with mandating technological improvement does nothing to bring about improvement, but does drive a fair number of businesses to relocate somewhere government does not punish their failure to pull rabbits out of hats.  If the object is strictly one of control, then regulate; but if to improve then get out of the way.  In the meantime, if you are really worried about those horridly awful deadly cancerous rays, try spending less time in the direct sun!

News Flash! The FDA wrongly accused tomatoes of poisoning – Free the tomatoes, hang the FDA and start an investigation into punishing the innocent while shielding the guilty!  The Baltimore Sun article emphasis is on assigning blame more than extolling their once pet agency as making us safer despite an occasional false alarm or misidentification of culprit.  You would think a liberal rag like the Sun would defend the FDA as one of its own creatures.  Somehow, that history eludes our geniuses at the Sun.  Our food-industry obviously benefits more than it suffers from having the FDA around, keeping them from making costly mistakes and shielding them from competition. Why else would the industry defend the FDA so often against criticism?  Nope, not good enough; the FDA must be perfect or it’s a total screw-up.  Fanned by the media and tort-lawyers, the tomato industry now expects compensation for the bad press.  Maybe they’d rather the FDA just kept its mouth shut while the bodies pile up!  There’s a rule-of-thumb that says a 20% effort gets 80% of the job done; and, inversely, that last 20% takes an 80% effort.  This is a fancy way of saying "diminishing returns."  Yes, the FDA flubbed one.  So what?  Now, the demand for perfection will drive us to put geometrically greater effort into eliminating any possibility of error with the result that the next outbreak of salmonella will cost exponentially more to not quite prevent.  Get out your checkbooks.

This week’s big story: 17 girls imitating art, imitating life, imitating art.  What art are these Gloucester teen-geniuses imitating?   How about fairytale TV season opener: "Secret Life of the American Teenager"?  This drivel cum reality-play follows shy geeky couldn’t-get-a-date-if-it-killed-her morphed to got-boys-hanging-on-every-word princess as a result of getting knocked up by some jerk; with Pretty in Pink Molly Ringwald flitting in the wings playing scarcely chiding Mommy Dearest.  The Gloucester School superintendent opines his 17 are “girls who lack self-esteem and have a lack of love in their life.”  How does he know this and what relevance does it have to making a pact to commit stupidity (with a bum, no less)?  Or, is it more likely these are a bunch of little girls in need of some old-fashioned parenting; who have vacuously embraced Hollywood’s trash values without benefit of an interpreter?  Oh, but the school contraceptive-officials were AWOL; so that explains everything – right?  Well, no, but that was gossip too juicy to leave out of the story.  Comment by one of last year’s crop of mommy-wannabees: "I don't call it a mistake because the way I look at is everything happens for a reason."  Run that by me again!?  It’s not a mistake because it happens? – for a reason?  And, the reason would be . . . she won’t make that mistake again?  Brilliant!  How about using your head and avoiding stuck in solo-parentis?  And, who is the real-life model for this pact with ditz-destiny – the air-head sister of an air-head pop-idol – Jamie Lynn Spears!  Here’s a clue, girls.  Jamie Lynn has more money than you to pay her way out of mistakes.  We can be pretty sure the live-in nanny and enabling pop-star family will make playing grown-up everything you imagine – for her, not you.

Also from the Sun, home-sick sex-challenge turned best-seller.  Where else but Charm City (home of John Waters – Pink Flamingoes, Hair Spray, Serial Mom) would people confuse porn with a normal, healthy relationship and put it on display?  There, and . . . Hollywood . . . San Francisco . . . Denver . . . Miami . . . Amsterdam . . . London . . . Okay, so while not exactly unique, is still tacky and speaks volumes about how far we’ve sunk that even couples with kids espousing "family values" think this is fair topic for polite conversation and are okay with their parents (and someday their kids) reading their sexploits.  I really could have gone another year without knowing Mr. & Mrs. Tweedy-Jacquet are out-of-the-closet sex-maniacs.  Oy!  Just so you don’t think all us Baltimoreans are warped, there are a few who verge on normal . . . Okay!?

Speaking of good old San Fran, the sanctuary mentality has resulted in a crack addiction upsurge in Fog City.  Might the coyote gang-bangers learn from this it’s much safer using kids to peddle street product?   Probably, they had that figured out already but why encourage it?  What would Bogart say?

A just released U.N. report declares the cure for too much economic meddling is . . . you got it . . . more economic meddling; by a still bigger meddler – the U.N.  If the G8, combined financial industries of the world, gurus like Milton Friedman, and all the lesser entrepreneurs from Warren Buffet to Jimmy Buffet are insufficient to understand and control the variations of a vast dynamic economy, what better qualification does the U.N. imagine it brings to the table?  The thrust of this latest U.N. manifesto is the free-market must be tamed.  They invoke the tired and trite argument that when markets fail, the poor are the first and hardest hit.  No doubt, but they say nothing of what they will do better at controlling the market without also killing it (as socialists always do).   It has been amply demonstrated you can control an economy, but only at the cost of suffocating it.  You control anything that oscillates by capping the highs and hoarding to flesh out the bottoms.  If you allow uncapped highs, you risk dislocations when things tumble.  Therefore, the only sure way to prevent a failing market is to keep it on its knees.  It is the dislocation of rise and fall causing these so-called “harsh effects.”  The market hasn’t really failed and conditions aren’t really "harsh," of course.  They are harsh only in comparison to something better.  We had it tolerably good as kids half a century ago; but compared to what kids have today, those were "harsh" times (e.g., hand-me-downs, retread toys, homemade food, out-of-pocket medical, walked to school, window fans instead of A/C, two to a bed, etc.).  However, the highs are felt most by the poorest too; and then it is to their benefit.  These wonks are complaining that globalization has magnified the down-market dislocations thereby affecting greater numbers.  Well, duh!  But, it also means the circle of prosperity has spread to reach far more who have been trapped in poverty until freed by a liberating market.  Their solution: restrict market expansion.  When the market falls, it is start over from where poor folks were – not some place lower.  Overall, free-markets create far more prosperity than do managed-markets, and it is well worth enduring the brief downturns to ride those highs.  Nope, folks, this is about raw, undiluted power.  Control is power, economic control is the gold-standard of power, and the U.N. wants to be the big-dog; so don’t you buy it.

Starbucks warns it will close 600 franchise stores in the coming year; blaming the high cost of gas and food for lost sales.  Will media retreads and elitist java addicts be forced to choose this winter between heating oil and mocha nirvana?  Anyone care enough to take up a collection to help them through the crisis?

CNN this week did a follow up on the woman who died in a New York psychiatric ward.  The report devotes as much print to hospital sanitation and disrepair as to wrongful death.  As appalling as these conditions are, they aren’t any worse than some better British hospitals and far better than the socialized care of virtually any third-world hospital.  The WSJ guy saw British healthcare at its absolute best.  He had a lot of strings pulled on his behalf, without which he’d have a still lower opinion.  I have UK friends who tell me it is worse – much worse.  He also got away with British taxpayers footing most of the bill; leaving him with the impression British substandard care is substantially cheaper than American so-so care.  Wrong again.  I took a look at the total cost (including taxes) awhile back, and was surprised to learn Brits pay only a little less for direct services, and things we take for granted as included are, for them, extras paid out of pocket.  When you include these little "extras" the average Brit winds up paying more than the average American.  He is right about the slightly better attitude and involvement of British staff, but attitude only takes you so far when you have to wait weeks to months praying you won’t die before you get a proper diagnosis (PS, I’ve known some great staff this side of the pond too looking after my loved ones).  Not that we’re really that much less "socialized" when it comes to medicine, but we have held onto a couple of critical market advantages.  Both these reports completely miss the real story on why these things happen, some of which is detailed here. The only thing I find to disagree with this last guy is: he correctly diagnoses mainstream medicine only to unrealistically praise and shamelessly promote voodoo medicine.  If medical deregulation were to happen, homeopathy would still have its fringe following; but would not reap the market-explosion he imagines.  Ah, well.  I suppose half sane is better than none.

"Open up AnWar or I torch the Chevron!" Angered by gas prices and incited by the [misinformed] media as to whom to blame, one woman took it on herself to rectify the situation.  I hope her neighbors, who now have to drive to Walnut Creek for gas, appreciate all she’s done for them (and the environment)!  I guess the Starbucks was just an afterthought because they closed the one next to her favorite Barnes & Noble.

Broadband sales not what was expected?  Convince the great unwashed it’s a must have! At least that’s what broadband-messiah and let’s-get-government-involved activist Vint Cerf seems to be saying.  Ignore we don’t really need it in every home, make it a cause that will divide the haves from have-nots and then mandate it as a right.  “Build it, and they will come!”  And, by all means, have government build it because that way it doesn’t cost a thing!

Here’s the latest environmentally-friendly automobile.  Not really, but when I saw this it just struck me funny and that some jester might be putting us on.

Last year, we had an epidemic of fat.  This year expect to be told you don’t sleep right or enough.  The obesity epidemic craze was created when public health gurus lowered the qualification of what it meant to be obese – big time.  Suddenly, we had an epidemic even though nothing had actually changed.  So, here we go again.  Sleep researcher Rubin Naiman declares us a "sleep deprived nation" and CNN concludes our bosses must be working us to death.  Naiman works with people well outside the bell curve and makes money telling people they need his services; so it is not inconceivable his perspective is skewed.  Maybe he’s getting a rash of sleep-disordered patients, suggesting a surge, but that can be for reasons other than a nationwide crisis (e.g., a change in Medicare/Medicaid rules maybe?).  The article praises employers who provide "nap rooms" (soon to be mandated, I suppose).  According to CNN’s link, I burned out 35-years ago.  Yet here I am a 13.5 hour/day workaholic, sleep 6.5-hours, have never passed out sitting at my desk, and still going strong.  Have I ever felt that mid-day, post-lunch slump – you bet!  When it happens, I get off my butt and out of the cubicle long enough it doesn’t find me face down in paperwork.  I’ve worked these kinds of hours most of my adult life, and long ago found my equilibrium.  I also go to sleep at a regular time and early enough I don’t wake up shy of my quota.  Most people my age do this, and if there is a surge, perhaps it is because the work-age demographic has shifted toward new-hires.  Right now, a lot of baby-boomers are exiting the workforce, their much delayed kids just entering, and a huge gap in between.  Not everyone needs exactly 8-hours, some of us actually feel lethargic when we sleep that much.  The photo in the article is of a twenty-something guy just out of college and the other interviewee admits she’s sleep-disordered.  However, that does not mean she’s sleep disordered by her job as the article implies.  Collegians and recent grads are notorious for keeping late hours, ignoring signs it’s time to put down that beer-keg and hit the sack; and think it perfectly fine sneaking in some Z’s on company-time rather than Miller-Time.  Kids have been doing that since the sixties (“If you can remember the sixties, you weren’t there”).  So, please, let’s not start yet another obsessive health fad/crisis!

I don’t know how it is where you live, but here we can buy all the fireworks we want – so long as we don’t actually use them.  Until last year, you could still do the virtually failsafe sprinklers, but even those are banned now in some places.  It doesn’t seem to have killed sales though, because highways are lined with firework tent-concessions.  Is there a disconnect here?  Not really.  Aboveboard sales create the impression it is okay; which leads to lots of arrests and fines (can you say, "revenue stream?").  So, support your local government – buy, buy, buy and burn baby, burn.

Yeah, I know, a lot of people (mostly kids) get hurt using the things, but something has definitely been lost when we no longer decide for ourselves how much personal risk we can take or for what.  Fifty years ago (that’s practically the Civil War to you younger folks), I was one of those carefree junior-scientists happily supplying Freedom-Day pyrotechnics to friends my age.  I learned how to make gunpowder, work fulminate of mercury, and wrap ‘crackers before I discovered the thrill of that first stolen kiss.  I made Chinese rockets as good as factory-made pyrotechnics, complete with multi-colored explosions.  We ran around playing war-games, lobbing half-dried mud-balls with firecrackers stuck in them to simulate grenades; all but oblivious to the hazard we ran.  In all those years, we never had a single serious injury to a firecracker, rocket or fountain; though, our parents never tired of relating [fabricated?] tales of kids who’d lost eye or finger to the darned things (yeah, and we told those same tales to our kids).  My parents successfully curbed my enthusiasm, and I suppose I have them to thank I still have all 10 fingers.  At some point, though, we decided parents aren’t good enough and began letting cops do the dirty.  That quickly grew from a convenience to a mandate.  Still not enough, we allowed as adults are just big kids needing the same supervision.  Finally, we’ve arrived at a point where we think anyone not a "highly trained specialist" is unfit to touch a firework (never mind those "experts" have accidents too).  The 4th has gone from unfettered-license-to-wreak-havoc to ho-hum-does-anyone-even-remember-what-it-signifies.  I suppose I’ll live to see only simulated fireworks on HDTV.   Somehow, it just ain’t the same thing.

Hope you had a happy (and safe) Freedom Day.