Mea Culpa...or Justin
Timberlake’s version, "I know it's been a rough week on everybody, and, um,
what occurred was unintentional, completely regrettable, and I apologize
if you guys were offended." Hey Justin, you cretinsky, apologies are
proffered for the same reason you don’t chew food with your mouth open...it’s
called personal development.
More to the point than the people who find your boorish behavior repulsive
should be the internal desire not to insult your entire genetic tree with
a lack of breeding. If however, like so many, you were hatched in a
spider hole, your begrudging insincerity is...well, just begrudging insincerity.
Your ass is in a jam and you’ll do anything to keep pursuing your selfish
And speaking of asses in a jam, there’s always the saga of Timberlake’s pathologically
pure soul mate, Joseph P. Smith. Smith is the video star who dragged
off 11-year-old Carlie Brucia in Sarasota, Florida. He is now charged
in her kidnapping and murder. Talk about a forgiving world:
1. April 26, 1993: Smith is charged with aggravated battery after he
hits a 21-year-old woman in the face with a motorcycle helmet outside a Sarasota
2. Sept. 29, 1993: Smith pleads no contest to aggravated battery and
loitering. A judge withholds adjudication, meaning Smith is not convicted
of the crime. He gets probation.
3. Nov. 24, 1994: Smith arrested on a domestic battery charge after confrontation with first wife. Charges dismissed.
4. July 1, 1997: Smith is arrested carrying a serrated, 5-inch knife
concealed in his waistband outside a Kash 'N Karry grocery store. A month
later, he pleads no contest to weapons charge. A judge convicts him. Smith
5. Nov. 7, 1997: Smith is charged with kidnapping, false imprisonment,
and battery on allegations he tried to snatch 20-year-old Teri Jo Stinson
as she walked alongside a Bradenton road. Stinson, who told cops Smith threatened
to cut her, is rescued by a group of tourists who saw the two struggling.
Smith argues at trial six months later that he was trying to prevent Stinson
from running into the road. A jury acquits him.
6. March 31, 1999: Smith is charged with possession of six small bundles
of heroin, illegal possession of anti-depressants, pain killers and blank
prescription forms. He pleads no contest to the drug charges. A jury convicts
Smith and he gets 18 months probation.
7. May 4, 2000: Smith is arrested after he presents a fake prescription
for 250 doses of the pain killer Oxycontin at a Sarasota Walgreen's.
8. Aug. 30, 2000: Smith's probation officer notifies the court of his
May 4 arrest, which violated his probation. `Probation officer Marcos Olivari
recommended increased probation over the option of 5 years in prison.
9. Sept. 28, 2000: Smith pleads no contest on the drug charges. He
is convicted and sentenced to six months house arrest followed by one year
10. Sept. 5, 2001: Smith is arrested after he tried to buy 100 doses
of the pain killer Dilaudid at a drive-through pharmacy using fake prescriptions.
11. Nov. 20, 2001: Smith pleads no contest on the probation violations
and the additional drug charges. He is convicted and sentenced to 17 months
in state prison.
12. Jan. 9, 2003: Weeks after his prison release, Smith is charged with possession of cocaine and drug paraphernalia.
13. March 6, 2003: Smith pleads no contest to the drug charges. He
is convicted and sentenced to a one-year drug offender program and two years
14. Aug. 15, 2003: Smith goes on a cocaine binge and becomes suicidal,
records say. He is committed by his family and cops. He was released from
Manatee Glens rehab center on Aug. 26. ''He subsequently tested positive
for cocaine,'' court records show. There's no record his probation officers
suspended his probation because of his drug use.
But don’t fear, in true Grammy Awards style (Timberlake was invited to the
Grammy’s telecast on the proviso that he issue a one-sentence apology about
his simul-rape Super Bowl moment), Sarasota Capt. Jeff Bell promises that
Smith, "... will pay the ultimate price." No doubt that Smith will
shortly be compelled to “apologize if you guys were offended.”
Any sense of accountability in this country has been reduced to the bravado
of tough talk and the application of Botox Band-Aids. Gutless officials
apply superficial and temporary solutions to critical problems. When
the rubber hits the road, the tough talkers lose their convictions and fold
their tents. Florida’s most immediate reaction to the travesty known
as their criminal justice system was for Sarasota school officials to call
out the ..."'comfort’ dogs, which are trained to respond to emotionally upset
humans, for the students to pet.”
But why just blame gutless officials when any attempt at accountability is
countered by heads and spines full of mush? Convicted California child
killer, Kevin Cooper, has become a cause célèbre for Hollywood’s
enfants terribles including international luminary Sean
Penn. Commit a quadruple hatchet murder including 10 and 11 year old
children, spend twenty years of taxpayer resources in appeals, have every
court find “no doubt” about his guilt and call out the Botox squad...he might
be innocent. And there might be frozen Clark Bars on Pluto.
There is nothing unique about Florida’s judicial snafus. The American
culture has morphed into a stagnancy of tough talk, Botox Band-Aids, crocodile
tears and unaccountability. It’s like wrapping rotten meat in a pretty
pastry shell. As the only major White House hopeful who opposes the
death penalty, let’s hope that John Kerry can jump into the fray on this
one. After all...he might know something about Botox.
Daniel Sargis, a freelance writer, is a principal in a private investment development company. His website is dansargis.org.